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�Ah. I have school tomorrow Joy-ness.�

Not much else... Still canapos;t ride obviously. Itapos;ll be a while. I have training sessions with my dogs before we start agility. So thatapos;ll be fun... God I hate the people at my school. I just canapos;t get over how immature they are. It really, really sucks. I canapos;t be myself around them because they just wouldnapos;t understand. Ugh.

~livz

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Tonight i went to factory of terror with ellie, nick, nick, brad, eric, and branden
it was so much fun and sooo scary
i have writtten in the lately, actually i havent written in it since�i was going camping and that was forever ago.
summer went good im so sad it was over.
and highschool is going good. I like my classes and the change.
steven and i are no longer dating, he broke up with me in like september.
he wants to date again but i dont because the same thing is gonnna haappen. We arenapos;t gonna hang out and then we will just break up again. Ahhhh fuck it.
hate it sooooo much
wwwwhatevaz.
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I wanna sleep, too man, iapos;m so tired. Except for the breif starbucks run i made, since the moment i woke up, i have been in my house studying.

=S waaa... I canapos;t even remember the last time i studied this hard. Maybe last april, for finals? no, i donapos;t even think i studied as hard then.

god, these language courses are seriously tiring me out. Iapos;ve only been studying japanese and latin today; havenapos;t even had a moment to touch my korean nor my greek books. Jumping by and forth between japanese and latin is really starting to drive me nuts. I kinda feel like iapos;m not absorbing anything cause iapos;m not consistent with what iapos;m studying. Well, at least iapos;ve finished my japanese reading. All iapos;ve got to do is submit my assignment, then i can focus on my latin for the rest of the night and all of tomorrow (my japanese midtern ainapos;t till wednesday, so iapos;ve got time).

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[someone is looking less than happy.]

[has the door to his room open, sitting on his bed with a bottle of some booze he found in the kitchen - he doesnapos;t know enough about drinking to even care what it is - heapos;s never invited to those parties. But heapos;s pretty sure itapos;s some kind of schnapps? Whatever, it tastes like apricots, supposedly.]

[playing some FPS game on his laptop, leans back on some pillows, opens the bottle and has a swig, sighs] ...Hope I donapos;t barf on my laptop. Ffp.

[has another drink as he fumbles with his keyboard] Boom, headthot. [smiles to himself]
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Guys, I donapos;t know who started it (and I donapos;t want to know who started it) but all posts need to continue to stay formatted correctly. I understand you may consider it a pain in the ass to copy and paste the title and all over and over again but... It keeps things orderly. Iapos;m OCD, you all have been warned of such, and every post iapos;ve seen improperly formatted so far as driven me near crazy.

If you have an improperly formatted post (I wonapos;t post examples), please edit it before Sunday evening when I count up points.

This post will be deleted on Sunday because itapos;s ugly. Bleh.

And be prepared. The bitchmod (thatapos;s me.) is about to break this community down and start alllll over again.

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What is a week?

I spent most of the night in a dimly lit bar tapping my feet to The Ramones and Johnny Cash explaining how this had been such a tremendously long week. Now sitting here in front of my computer it seems like itapos;s all been a lesson in how short a week can be. That makes sense in a way, because at this point I finally know that the party is over and experiences always seem shorter from the other side of them. Iapos;m not being all sad bastard about it either, I know there will be other parties, and less substantial but still good times in between. I feel exhausted and rejuvenated at once and like I could write a lengthy essay just connecting dots that found their way into my life this week.

Though if Iapos;m honest, I guess there is a kind of sadness setting in. Time is relative as they say which is I guess why Iapos;m not sad about leaving folks I see several times a year. Several times a year may not be very often after all, but itapos;s several times more a year than a lot of my friends and family see me. Then on the other hand thereapos;s at least one person who in all likelihood I wonapos;t see for at least a year, and I miss them already and there is a tinge of sadness to that idea, a sadness that I donapos;t feel in relation to friends and family I see even less often.

Strangeness abounds.

I remarked tonight that last year was about me learning to be social, and that this year was about me being the guy I was learning to be then. I feel like Iapos;m in a state of inbetweeness there. I feel found and lost at turns. This week I often caught myself mirroring inflections and mannerisms of folks I was hanging out with, and thatapos;s the surest compliment I can pay a person; because thatapos;s me subconsciously integrating the parts of you all that were teaching me about who I really am. I canapos;t speak for the event, but my being there was about my other tomorrow, after a year spent battling for my past, this week had me firmly standing in the future. Itapos;s a nice direction to be in. Not all of it was change...there were also quiet moments where I realized in the ways I was like someone, or the way their body spoke when I was around that there is a lot about me already who is already who Iapos;m meant to be.

I know itapos;s totally corn ball, but fuck I really wish I could just gather up some of you and road trip endlessly. And if I do sound too serious or sentimental, letapos;s just agree to blame it on a weekapos;s worth of heavy drinking, drug taking, and sleep deprivation finally catching up to me. I wish I was in a position right now to quit my job and spend at least the next year couch surfing, writing, and of course collaborating with you all. Certainly..itapos;s quickly becoming a priority, I think I was made to be nomadic.

And I guess thatapos;s as good a place as any to stop for now. Time to catch up on some much needed sleep.
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I just poured out my feelings in french for tmrapos;s essay, and it feels good. I find myself thinking french for quite a bit, espcially todayapos;s class. Zomg the mispronunciation of french brands IRK ME. THEY IRK ME. GO LEARN THE PROPER PRONUNCIATION sheesh.

this is what you call, not only the typical bitch of the 4th year syndrome, but also bitch of the I-know-french-and-you-donapos;t syndrome. And surprisingly it doesnapos;t happen for japanese because i think my 3 years studying it has amounted to zilch.

I sooo prefer french. Grrrrr. Et alors, from now on i shall blog in french.

psych.
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Ok so I havenapos;t like updated this thing in FOREVER
First off, I donapos;t really enjoy reading a lot, but I picked up a book by the same author as Running With Scissors(Augusten Burroughs) and its a book full of short stories about his quirky life and how he got through it all. Its called Magical Thinking and if you have a short attention span on books but you still feel the urge to read one to keep your brain relativly healthy I suggest you pick it up.
Second of all, I feel like my days at the bakery are comming to an end because they have run me dry. I have 4 or 5 catering orders on my shoulders 5 days a week. I work 6 days and half of those days I ended up working about a 12 hour shift. If that doesnapos;t kill me... Then I might kill me. But I wonapos;t. Anyways, I feel like its time for me to move on. I need some time to work out my GED, bartending and lisence. So I applied at a few places and got 2 call backs. I am now technically employed at Micheals as well as the bakery right now. I also had an interview with a new brewery being put up by where Rasputin is. Bjapos;s its called. I canapos;t help but snicker at the name. Anyways, the interview went well I thought but there is no certain answer as to if I will get the job until the head chef decides to weed out the other contenders as well. Weapos;ll see. Iapos;m trying to be optomistic.
Thirdly(if thatapos;s infact a real word), last night I went to see Angels Airwaves and Weezer. It was an amazing show. Like AMAZING. Well, it first started off when we got lost in the "yellow light district" of San Jose. One way streets make me nervous. I listened to New Kids on the Block to make Paige irritated. It wasnapos;t the songs per-say... It was my singing them. Lol. Anyways, we made it there just in time to here "Thank you we are Tokyo Police Club, Good night" Then it was the longest intro I have ever stood through to finally see Tom DeLongeapos;s love handles. It was worth it though as his kind of, just whiney enough, voice sang about love though a whole hour set. Their music is really good. I think for the longest time I underestimated them. After my epileptic seizure caused by the constant flashing lights and my upset that they didnapos;t play Do It For Me Now once again we stood there talking with these girls about how scary ropes courses are at camps... Iapos;m not sure how it came up. Then Weezer came on and started real strong. Tom came out to join them for Undone(Sweater Song) and then the bassist did a Pink Floyd cover... Then it got really really tiring. People around us were saying things like "is it over yet?" Their 4 slow song block really put people to sleep only to wake them up again wit ha few more hits before bringing tons of kids who played everything from banjos to the triangle and they did Island in the Sun. Then just when Paige started talking about Nirvana(for some weird reason) between the show and encore they played Silver by Nirvana and we felt like we were the only people who knew the song. Everyone around us was like WTF. Needless to say, it was a really good show. Some unexpected things, some expected hits. Good stuff.
Ok and last but not least, Iapos;M GOING TO VEGAS ON FRIDAY OMG I cannot wait You have no idea. OMG... OMG.
Well mom says I have cold spaghetti ready for me since I took so long trying to type this up and catching up on my youtube. Later gators
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My Angellus (angel bear) flies out tomorrow eek� Iapos;m nervous for him I hope he get there Ok� He went to the vet today for the last time, they gave him flea and tick stuff on his back and gave him three dewormer pills. He was NOT happt about that at all. I think they stressed him out, because he was very sleepy and kinda slow moving when he got home, and not really acting like he wanted to do much of anything. Poor baby. The lady also took his temp, she was like poking around at his poor tush and satthere with the thermometer in him for like 5 minutes >.< God poor Angelbear� mustapos;ve been traumatized.

Iapos;m gonna miss the hell out of him , I leave 4 days after he does. Then he;s in quarantine for 30 days. Which thankfully I get to go visit him, but I wonapos;t� get to see him for a good� week and a half.

but he will really do well I think at the quarantine facility, heapos;ll have other kittys to meow at and peoples to play with him :)

Anyway heres a pic of him tonight, iapos;ll see if I can post departing pictures :)

� he says MOW gimmeh foods mom, I am traumatized and stuff. Hehe



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